2am thoughts

so tell me, was i just another easy girl you had to fulfill your needs? just another girl to help you get over the one before?
what happened to me making you feel alive? that i understand you really well?
we could have deep conversations that would last for hours and somehow comfort each other, yet now all of that went to shit.
i was told to open myself up again because who knows maybe you were different? maybe you would appreciate me being emotionally there, maybe you would not take my 'golden heart' as you call it for granted.
you told me i deserved so much more than she gave me, that you had seen how much effort i had put into her and how much i was emotionally there for her, that what she did to me was bullshit yet here you are doing the exact same thing as she did.
only difference is that you actually dropped me, while she kept coming back and fucking me over.
i was right to be scared that i would be hurt again because that happened and now im here typing away like a mad man with no real purpose.
im here at almost 2am trying to wrap my head around the fact that i was never important to you like you had told me, im here trying to not cry at all the anger and hurt im feeling right now.
hope it was worth it tho, being an asshole while claiming you are different.